It's All About Love

Do you notice how many books ultimately make the same point about what is important in life? Eddie, in Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven is taken on an afterlife journey - back to his past - to discover the five people who taught him life's important lessons even though he was unaware of it at the time. I think Eddie's lessons were: 1) there are no random acts, we are all connected; 2) sacrifices, big and little, are a part of life; 3) we must forgive our parents; 4) love is the strongest tie and 5) as we do unto others, so it will be done unto us.

Are these the important lessons we are to learn in life? Are there others that are as important? If each of us were asked to write out five lessons we have learned (and five teachers we have had) what and who might we come up with? It's interesting to speculate but the point of Albom's book, of course, is that we don't know as we go through life who and what might be teaching us something.

How About These Menus?

I'm wondering if my book club should adopt the menus of The Jane Austen Book club. At Jocelyn's they had slices of Kentucky bourbon cake, both lemon and creme de menthe squares, and almond crescent cookies. Too many sweets? Allegra settled for serving cheese and crackers around the fire at her mother's but there were many glasses of wine to help wash those down. Grigg went all out (perhaps to prove "Y's" could do it as well as "X's") with his menu of green salad with dried cranberries and candied walnuts, cheeses, pepper crackers, several dips including artichoke, and, for dessert, cheesecake. All served with wine, of course. Grigg's cheesecake was "store-bought," not that that wouldn't be delicious. But Sylvia's menu of peach margaritas, followed by "homemade" strawberry sherbet served with "homemade" sugar cookies sounds awfully nice.
MMMM, mmmmmmmmmmm, good!

An Entertaining Novel

Having not read the Jane Austen books for many years and (OK, I'll admit it) paying very little attention to the movies, recent and otherwise, I wondered if one could read The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler and enjoy it without rereading the Austen books. In my opinion - well - yes. First of all, it's an entertaining read. Secondly, you don't have to know the Austen books inside out as Fowler constantly draws parallels and provides a reference section.

There's not a great deal of plot in this novel; it's more about the characters. The structure of the book is interesting. Each of the six chapters in the novel parallels one of Austen's six novels and each chapter is loosely, although not exclusively, about one of the six members of the Jane Austen Book Club. The six members of the club are all connected in some way to Jocelyn. Sylvia has been Jocelyn's friend since childhood; Allegra is Sylvia's daughter; Prudie met Jocelyn at a screening of the movie Pride and Prejudice; Bernadette was married to Jocelyn's godfather; and Grigg, the only male in the group, met Jocelyn in a hotel where he was attending a sci-fi convention and she a Hound Roundup. Jocelyn breeds dogs, is unmarried, and is the instigator of the club.

Fowler uses a number of different writing techniques throughout the book. There is on-going narration interspersed with flashbacks as key events in the lives of the six characters are revealed. Some of the most entertaining parts of the book are those in which the group speaks collectively. These are written in a breezy, slightly gossipy, but chatty rather than catty manner. For example, in one part we learn that Bernadette doesn't much care how she dresses in public - "Prudie had once seen Bernadette in the supermarket...". Oh? Did Prudie report that to everyone? Or, we might be told "her eyebrows had grown in and that was a relief." Oh? To whom? "The group" observes and picks one another apart, but they care for one another. The only character "on the outside" in these bits is Grigg - the five women don't want to concede that he might have as valid opinions of Austen as they do. There's a slight snootiness when Grigg serves a cheesecake with a "store bought crust" but then they concede "we'd all bought store bought on occasion." The group of women is quite of one mind in many of their opinions and they are all very literate and passionate about the Austen books. In one of the most hilarious scenes at a library benefit dinner Prudie and Bernadette have a go at making a mockery of a rather pompous mystery writer who is seated at their table who doesn't have time for "women's books."

What is the book really about? I think probably it is best said by Allegra when she notes that in Jane Austen's books "virtue will be rewarded" and "love will prevail." In The Jane Austen Book Club we have six people who are in various stages of relationships (or none) and who, by the end of the book, all have someone in their lives. Bernadette has no one at the beginning and at the end she has met a man in Costa Rico; Jocelyn and Grigg are not involved with anyone at the beginning but at the end they are a dating pair; Sylvia at the beginning is breaking up her 30 year marriage to Daniel but at the end they are being reconciled; Allegra is probably going back to her lesbian lover Corinne. The only "unchanged" relationship is Prudie and Dean's. They are married at the beginning and they are still married as the book ends.

This is a novel about relationships, how they are formed and how they endure. Just as "a dance is about its enormous potential for joy or disaster," so, too, is any relationship. And sometimes you just have to take a chance: as Bernadette observes "you can't possibly know all your husband's failings until you've been married awhile." Some of us love more and some are more loved. In Prudie's take on it "you can marry someone you're lucky to get or you can marry someone who's lucky to get you." And Jane Austen gets the final word: "The mere habit of learning to love is the thing."

The Tuesday Group

Spring came early to Nova Scotia this year. My golf course has been open since April 5th and there have been some lovely warm days, including today, Sunday, April 23. My "Tuesday Group" were out for 9 holes. It was a chance to renew our friendship, and continue pursuing our quest for an improved game. From now until the end of October every Tuesday will see our group on the golf course, weather permitting. There will be some weeks when one or another of the group will be away because of appointments or a trip with family or the course will be closed for a tournament. But betting "dollars to doughnuts" at least three of the group will show up!

Why take part in such a structured activity? The main reason is that the club we belong to is busy and tee times have to be made in advance. Having a compatible group of four and a regular commitment makes for a pleasant golfing routine.

Besides playing in "the Tuesday Group" I will also be out golfing two or three other times in a typical week, so I suppose the real question is why "golf"? What is so intriguing about this game? There is a t-shirt saying, "golf is life, all the rest is just details," and sometimes I think they got that right. When I'm on the golf course I feel alive, involved and connected to other people and the outdoors. I find the game a fine way of challenging myself physically and mentally. There is always a new twist.

Quilting Expressions

I've made a number of patchwork quilts and wall hangings. I seem to like choosing bright, happy strong colours. I made one large scrap quilt that I think shows a bit of drama, independence and creativity in its choices of colour combinations and repeat patterns. But what I would really like to do is try to make an art quilt. These expressions are generally not the kinds of quilts one puts on a bed. They are made to be hung on the wall like paintings. They may be landscapes or abstract designs; they may be impressionistic with lovely bits of colour or they may be wildly expressionistic using different textures.
Now, let me see............... when can I get started?? Too many choices, not enough time!

Making Connections

I think there is a great connection between the spirituality of an artist and the work the artist creates. If I could, that is, if I had the skill level to do so successfully, I would express many things of a spiritual nature in my own paintings. The intricate shapes in nature and the beauty of the natural world speaks to me of the dance, the wonder of it all, life. The changing seasons, the constant evolution-growth-decay of the natural world has parallels in our own lives. Art can speak of the the rhythm of life - success and failure, dying and rising, survival. The true, the beautiful, the harmonious, the serene, the loving and strong in life-enhancing ways - these are the themes that appeal to me in visual art.

My Links are Working Now

The links in my two previous posts are now working correctly! I'm just learning how to do this and after much persistence I finally got them right.

Time To Think About Austen

It's about time I got started on the book for my next Book Club meeting. This one is about a book club. We're reading The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler. Now, I have never read anything by this author before and I am worried that I have forgotten more about the Jane Austen books than I ever knew, so I am beginning my reading with some trepidation. The book begins with something like "each of us has a private Austen," and I wondered if I could dredge up anything from memory. I thought of romantic stories, but "romantic" with a twist, lots of ironic situations, witty revelations, accurate little insights into people and their actions, good and bad. I began reading - and, lo! - the six members of this fictional club have "private" Austens that have some of these same qualities. Perhaps this will be a fun read! And I have an ace up my sleeve, so to speak: I have a book club friend who is a real Austen fan and who will fill me in on more than I need to know at her House of all Sorts - I see she has already started with Emma.

Happy Easter

It's Easter! Having spent some time inWestern Canada and learning something of Ukrainian traditions I find today that I want to say "Christ is Risen" and to hear someone say "He truly has Risen!" - in Ukrainian Khrystos Voskres! followed by the response Voistyno Voskres! There are such wonderful Ukrainian Easter traditions - the making of special bread and the decorating of eggs with intricate symbols, the blessing of food - a rich culture. In Western Canada descendants of Ukrainian settlers keep the traditions alive and add so much to a multicultural milieu. I feel I've been fortunate to have had my life enriched by meeting so many people of Ukrainian descent and from learning to appreciate their beautiful, moving and deeply religious practices.

Yet More "Thin Slice and Thin Place Talk"

Interesting comments re thin slices (canary's comments in "More on Thin Slices"). Yes, I'm just reading Gladwell's chapter now on the dark side of thin slicing, how we can be led astray by our own cultural conditioning or lack of experience or knowledge, or more interestingly, even if we have the knowledge that should lead us to make a different judgement, our unconscious makes a biased judgement that we had no idea was there. The latter part of the book looks at how we can consciously alter the way we thin slice.

Meandering on - or back - to "thin places" - those times/events/places/people/moments - where our everyday reality comes in contact with the "felt sacred", I was struck by the comment by "mulberry" about two of her experiences. Her experience was just exactly what Sophie Burnham (and many, many others) would call "mystical experiences." Burnham writes in The Ecstatic Journey: The Transforming Power of Mystical Experience," about asking a woman to tell her about the most important moment in her life, something she could never forget, and this is what the woman said: "She said she that once she had walked out on the deck of her house at sunset, and there before her was spread a glorious sky, all orange and purple and blue. She'd seen a thousand sunsets before, but this time, she said, eyes glowing with the memory, it was so stunning that she knew she was meeting God. She could not forget it. But what had happened? Almost nothing to the outside eye."

My husband, who thinks my meandering is generally too airy-fairy for him, just looked at this and said he actually had an experience like that one time when he was driving in the Rocky Mountains and came around the corner and saw Mt. Robson for the first time.

Perhaps in another post I will write about an experience of mine.

Eight to Write

This past year I've become part of a writing interest group. We meet regularly and have a theme of some sort for each meeting. This month's theme was "art, anger, and aging" and the idea was to try to combine all three into a piece of writing. Yesterday we met and the whole group of eight were present to share. I had done a very short factual report using internet sources. Five of the group had written short fiction. One person read a reflective travel piece she had written and another a reflection on aging. I was amazed at the last piece of writing: it was not only written by the oldest member of the group, but it was beautifully put together - a great example of a type of personal essay writing that fits the description of "creative non-fiction." I admire this type of writing and have found several sites such as Bruce Dobler's that give excellent information.

More on Thin Slices

I've been thinking all morning about "thin slices" and I quite agree with "NW" (see Comments to my previous post) that we always tend to worry about making snap judgements when we want to give others the benefit of the doubt. I'm a retired teacher and I think this is especially so in education. Teachers try so hard to be objective and to measure progress accurately with exams and tests and so on. They try so hard not to make snap judgements based on first impressions, but I can say this (now that I'm retired) that within five minutes of meeting a new class I knew without a shadow of a doubt who the "troublemakers" would be, who the "top" academic students would be, who would have problems mastering the material, and so on. Scary, isn't it?

Of course, to give credit where it is due, educators are not unaware of the problems involved in "subjective" vs "objective" assessments. Over my 35 year career I was involved in various experiments at times that tried to address the problem. For example there was the "Pass / Fail" report card. The idea was to focus on learning and not on exams.

In education, things seem to go around in circles!

Thin Slices and Thin Places

Meandering on......I've recently been browsing through two very different books: one mentions "thin slices" and the other "thin places" and I find both ideas intriguing.

In Malcolm Gladwell's blink "thin slices" refers to small segments of experience that can tell us a great deal if only we can learn to trust them. Instead of shying away from making snap judgements, Gladwell says we should rely more on our first impressions and just what we know to be correct even if we can't explain it. For example we can learn a lot about people, their relationships with others, their trustworthiness, their organizational skills and so on in just a few minutes, in a "thin slice," with as much accuracy - if not more so - than in long drawn out studies and psychological tests. Knowledge that comes to us in a manner we can't explain may be nonetheless as valid as the more "scientific" or "reasoned" explanation.

Marcus J. Borg in The Heart of Christianity writes that in Celtic spirituality everything in the universe is "in God" and God is in everything in the visible world. We are just not aware of this except for moments when we do "see it" or do experience God shining through everything. These are "thin places" - when the visible world and the sacred meet for us as individuals. He goes on to explain that "thin places" are many and varied: a thin place can be a geographical locale such as a shrine but it can also be a wilderness setting; it can be music or art or poetry or it might be a church service; a thin place could be a person or it could be an event.

I really like both ideas - thin slices and thin places. There's a little bit of the mysterious here and maybe that's as it should be.

Books, Books, and More Books!

Books, books, and still more books! Over 500 boxes to be unpacked, sorted and arranged in categories. A winter's work of Saturday morning previewing, pricing, and packing now behind us. Everything from children's books, to non-fiction to classics to science to crafts and decorating to fly fishing to religion and art. For the next two days the hall will be filled with people - book dealers, collectors, bargain hunters and readers. It's our Annual Used Book Sale with the money raised going to various educational projects.

Didion's Year

I've just finished reading The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. It was the winner of the National Book Award for non-fiction in 2005. The book is an intensely personal account of the year following the sudden death of her husband, fellow writer John Gregory Dunne, a year that also saw their only daughter fight for her life in hospitals in New York and Los Angeles. Didion describes it as a year in which all previously held ideas about marriage and children, and grief and sanity were shaken. A concluding thought "time is the school in which we learn," rings true and hauntingly.

It's an interesting book. I found it rather remarkable that she could piece together so much detail of a year past: dates, events, times, medical reports, even one evening's supper menu. The book is as much about her life as a writer - the way she works - a keeper of notes, journals, reasearch, even a kitchen diary. I like her writing. In a way, it's a bit dis-jointed and non-linear, although it loosely follows the year. But it is more the re-counting of her thoughts in the year that is important - lines from poems, pieces of her husband's novels, remembered conversations, insights.

Mandalas

Here's something I would like to know more about. The Mandala Project website looks very good.

Arts Place

A very interesting arts community has been developing near where I live. I hope to take advantage of one of their summer programs. It's the Ross Creek Centre for the Arts and it's amazing how it has grown in the past few years. A planned Summer Festival sounds exciting.